About Al-anon
For over 50 years, Al-Anon (which includes Alateen
for younger members) has been offering hope and help to families and friends of alcoholics. It is estimated that each alcoholic
affects the lives of at least four other people... alcoholism is truly a family disease. No matter what relationship you have
with an alcoholic, whether they are still drinking or not, all who have been affected by someone else’s drinking can
find solutions that lead to serenity in the Al-Anon/Alateen fellowship. How
will Al-Anon help me? Many
who come to Al-Anon/Alateen are in despair, feeling hopeless, unable to believe that things can ever change. We want our lives
to be different, but nothing we have done has brought about change. We all come to Al-Anon because we want and need help.
In Al-Anon and Alateen, members share their
own experience, strength, and hope with each other. You will meet others who share your feelings and frustrations, if not
your exact situation. We come together to learn a better way of life, to find happiness whether the alcoholic is still drinking
or not. First Steps to Al-Anon
Recovery! The following link will provide you with a series of recordings
that will introduce you to Al-Anon.
First Steps to Al-Anon Recovery Recordings.
Who are the members of
Al-Anon and Alateen? Al-Anon
and Alateen members are people just like you and me–people who have been affected by someone else's drinking. They
are parents, children, spouses, partners, brothers, sisters, other family members, friends, employers, employees, and coworkers
of alcoholics. No matter what our specific experience has been we share a common bond: we feel our lives have been affected
by someone else's drinking. How
much is this going to cost? There
are no dues or fees in Al-Anon and Alateen meetings. Most groups pass a basket for voluntary contributions. Members are asked
to contribute what they can afford, so that the group can pay rent, provide literature, and offer support to local and worldwide
service centers. Is this
a religious fellowship? Al-Anon
Family Groups is a spiritual fellowship, not a religious one. We avoid discussion of specific religious doctrine, and members
of all faiths (or of none) are welcome. Our Twelve Steps ask us to find a "Power greater then ourselves" who can
help us solve our problems and find serenity. Each member is free to define that power in his or her own way.
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How do alcoholics affect families and friends?
Alcoholism is a family disease. The disease affects
all those who have a relationship with a problem drinker. Those of us closest to the alcoholic suffer the most, and those
who care the most can easily get caught up in the behavior of another person. We react to the alcoholic's behavior. We focus
on them, what they do, where they are, how much they drink. We try to control their drinking for them. We take on the blame,
guilt, and shame that really belong to the drinker. We can become as addicted to the alcoholic, as the alcoholic is to alcohol.
We, too, can become ill.
Are You Troubled by Someone's Drinking? Al-Anon
Is for You!
Millions of people are affected by the excessive
drinking of someone close. The following questions are designed to help you decide whether or not you need Al-Anon:
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Do you worry about how much someone else drinks?
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Do you have money problems because of someone else's
drinking?
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Do you tell lies to cover up for someone else's drinking?
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Do you feel that if the drinker cared about you, he or
she would stop drinking to please you?
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Do you blame the drinker's behavior on his or her companions?
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Are plans frequently upset or canceled or meals delayed
because of the drinker?
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Do you make threats, such as, "If you don't stop drinking,
I'll leave you"?
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Do you secretly try to smell the drinker's breath?
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Are you afraid to upset someone for fear it will set
off a drinking bout?
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Have you been hurt or embarrassed by a drinker's behavior?
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Are holidays and gatherings spoiled because of drinking?
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Have you considered calling the police for help in fear
of abuse?
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Do you search for hidden alcohol?
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Do you ever ride in a car with a driver who has been
drinking?
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Have you refused social invitations out of fear or anxiety?
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Do you feel like a failure because you can't control
the drinking?
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Do you think that if the drinker stopped drinking, your
other problems would be solved?
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Do you ever threaten to hurt yourself to scare the drinker?
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Do you feel angry, confused, or depressed most of the
time?
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Do you feel there is no one who understands your problems?
If you have answered "Yes" to any of these
questions, Al-Anon or Alateen may help you.
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Did You Grow Up with a Problem Drinker? Al-Anon Is for You!
Al-Anon is for families, relatives, and friends whose lives have been affected by someone else's
drinking. If someone close to you, such as a family member, friend, co-worker, or neighbor, has or has had a drinking problem,
the following questions may help you determine if Al-Anon is for you:
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Do you constantly seek approval and affirmation?
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Do you fail to recognize your accomplishments?
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Do you fear criticism?
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Do you overextend yourself?
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Have you had problems with your own compulsive behavior?
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Do you have a need for perfection?
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Are you uneasy when your life is going smoothly, continually anticipating problems?
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Do you feel more alive in the midst of a crisis?
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Do you still feel responsible for others, as you did for the problem drinker in your life?
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Do you care for others easily, yet find it difficult to care for yourself?
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Do you isolate yourself from other people?
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Do you respond with fear to authority figures and angry people?
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Do you feel that individuals and society in general are taking advantage of you?
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Do you have trouble with intimate relationships?
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Do you confuse pity with love, as you did with the problem drinker?
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Do you attract and/or seek people who tend to be compulsive and/or abusive?
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Do you cling to relationships because you are afraid of being alone?
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Do you often mistrust your own feelings and the feelings expressed by others?
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Do you find it difficult to identify and express your emotions?
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Do you think someone's drinking may have affected you?
If you have answered "Yes" to any of these questions, Al-Anon or Alateen may help you.
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